"I got 9 As and 1 B. I could have straight A's on my SPM, but I left 1 B to let the world know that As are not everything." - facebook status
came across this statement remind me about my past examinations. As ain't everything but of course your chances is high to get into top university to further your study, but it is not always helpful. I felt hopeless after few times my application for scholarship weren't accepted. I could have reached my potential of being a student if I got the scholarship though, it is kind of motivational for me but I didn't succeed. I feel weak and even weaker when I found out this place isn't a place of study at all. it is the environment that made me feel weak, and everyday is a challenge for me to continue living my life over here.
looking at my previous result makes me a little surprised, and I thought I could have been better. I believe what has been destined is just right for me, I believe that Allah has a better plan for me in the near future, either in my faith or my worldly perspectives.
however it is, I would try my best to improve myself, to improve my quality of life by learning lessons from the nature more than human, it is just because nature didn't change that much and God hide secrets behind it. life is complicated just like how complicated your body respond to any environmental changes and it can be learnt for those who wants to.
but I am still looking forward to learning human psychology in more details,